{"title":"THE VAULT","description":"\u003cp\u003eThese items don't live on Etsy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eLimited drops, site-only pieces, and quiet little experiments.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you're here, you were meant to be.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"cursed-housewife-club-pretty-in-peril-coloring-book","title":"Cursed Housewife Club: Pretty in Peril Coloring Book","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"158\" data-end=\"501\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"158\" data-end=\"200\"\u003eCursed Housewife Club: Pretty in Peril\u003c\/strong\u003e is a subversive coloring book for the glamorously unhinged. Step into a surreal domestic dreamscape where lipstick-stained martinis clash with haunted Tupperware, and vintage curls can’t hide the chaos beneath. This isn’t your grandmother’s kitchen—unless she summoned demons while baking casseroles.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"503\" data-end=\"829\" class=\"\"\u003eEach page features a twisted take on classic mid-century housewife aesthetics—think corsets, cauldrons, and chore wheels from hell. Perfect for coloring outside the lines (and maybe summoning something while you’re at it), \u003cem data-start=\"726\" data-end=\"743\"\u003ePretty in Peril\u003c\/em\u003e is for anyone who's ever looked at a pie crust and thought, “I could weaponize this.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"831\" data-end=\"889\" class=\"\"\u003eJoin the club. The pearls are fake, but the peril is real.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"831\" data-end=\"889\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/buyonamazon.png?v=1745195289\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50797700514111,"sku":"","price":18.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/aafd4352-33d3-4339-a175-2c3f0ea665d2.png?v=1779449585"},{"product_id":"feral-flora-a-coloring-book-of-carnivorous-curiosities","title":"Feral Flora: A Coloring Book of Carnivorous Curiosities","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-bold\"\u003eFeral Flora: A Coloring Book of Carnivorous Curiosities\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003eStep into the dark heart of nature with \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eFeral Flora\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, a sinisterly beautiful coloring book that invites you to explore a garden where the plants bite back. Inside, you’ll find a twisted collection of carnivorous blooms, venomous vines, and feral flora that blur the line between botanical wonder and nightmare fuel. Each page features intricately drawn creatures of the plant world—some eerily elegant, others downright monstrous—waiting to be brought to life with your own wild palette.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect for lovers of the strange, the spooky, and the naturally wicked, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan class=\"a-text-italic\"\u003eFeral Flora\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is not your average walk in the garden. Beware... these plants are hungry.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/dp\/B0F5X4QVH2\" title=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/dp\/B0F5X4QVH2\"\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/buyonamazon.png?v=1745195289\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50797728563519,"sku":"","price":19.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/0f08e179-6922-4eeb-aa06-551ee71460ae.png?v=1779449586"},{"product_id":"emotional-escape-planner-funny-self-help-journal-pdf-printable","title":"Emotional Escape Planner: Funny Self-Help Journal (PDF Printable)","description":"📜 The Unbothered Bandit’s Guide to Emotional Escape – A Printable Workbook for Chaotic Peace Seekers\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nReady to reclaim your power like a true emotional outlaw?\u003cbr\u003e\nThis printable PDF workbook delivers dramatic self-help with zero sugar-coating. Brought to you by The 8th House Gang, it’s packed with satirical worksheets, revenge affirmations, and personal growth disguised as a heist.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nPerfect for:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tScorpio energy baddies\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tShadow work with flair\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAnyone recovering from burnout, ghosting, or giving too many chances\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nIncludes:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\t15+ printable pages (PDF)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tEmotional vault mapping worksheet\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tEscape planning tools\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAffirmation Hit List\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tOutlaw license + recovery badge\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAnd more chaos in elegant disguise\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n📌 HOW TO USE:\u003cbr\u003e\nDownload \u0026gt; Print \u0026gt; Start healing (with sarcasm)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nUse it for journaling, spiritual rebellion, or simply to laugh through your existential unraveling.","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51389187981631,"sku":"ET-4324747374","price":11.47,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/il_fullxfull.6962771440_64ro.jpg?v=1757929126"},{"product_id":"deluxe-crystal-box-23-premium-crystals-gold-tarot-cards-witchy-gift-box-healing-stone-set-free-shipping","title":"Deluxe Crystal  Box  2-3 Premium Crystals + Gold Tarot Cards | Witchy Gift Box | Healing Stone  Set | Free Shipping","description":"✨ Deluxe Crystal Mystery Box\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n2–3 substantial, premium-quality crystals + 3 gold-inlay tarot cards + free shipping.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n*This is the luxury, “treat yourself” version of a mystery box — curated for crystal lovers who want meaningful, display-worthy pieces without the filler.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nSome pieces are bold and striking. Others are beautifully formed, polished, or energetically powerful.\u003cbr\u003e\nBut every box feels like treasure.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⭐ WHAT’S INSIDE\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🔮 2–3 Substantial, Premium-Quality Crystals\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nEach box includes a mix of elegant, eye-catching crystals such as:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tStatement towers\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tRaw textured pieces\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tPolished palm stones\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tClusters\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tSpheres\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tCarved shapes\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAura pieces (optional)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nEvery crystal is chosen for quality, energy, color, and display appeal, not just size.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n✨ 3 Gold-Inlay Tarot Cards\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nA mini reading included with every box:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tMetallic gold-foil tarot cards\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tIntuitively drawn\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tA message meant for your path\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tPerfect for altars, journaling, or décor\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n💌 Also Includes:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tLuxe tissue wrapping\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tWax-sealed packaging\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHandwritten “Queen’s Blessing” note\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tQR code to the Crystal Vault (meanings, care tips, extra bonuses)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⭐ BOX OPTIONS\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n✨ Deluxe Box (2 substantial crystals + 3 gold tarot cards)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n$46.95 — Free Shipping\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n✨ Deluxe Plus Box (3 substantial crystals + 3 gold tarot cards)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n$64.95 — Free Shipping\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⭐ WHY YOU’LL LOVE IT\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis mystery box is curated intentionally — not randomly thrown together.\u003cbr\u003e\nThe crystals feel elevated, witchy, and special, making it perfect for collectors and gift-givers.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nMost buyers say:\u003cbr\u003e\n“These feel like pieces I actually want to display.”\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nExactly the goal.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⭐ PERFECT FOR:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tCrystal collectors\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tTarot lovers\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tWitches \u0026amp; spiritual babes\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tGifts\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAltar upgrades\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tSelf-care magic\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAnyone who loves surprises with style\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⭐ FAQ\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nQ: Are the crystals real?\u003cbr\u003e\nYes. Only genuine stones — no fakes or imposters.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nQ: Can I choose the crystals?\u003cbr\u003e\nNo — mystery boxes choose you.\u003cbr\u003e\nBut you may list stones or colors you dislike.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nQ: Are these pieces large?\u003cbr\u003e\nThey vary — but every crystal is substantial, high-quality, and intentionally chosen to feel special.","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Deluxe Box","offer_id":51598075920703,"sku":"ET-27999266523","price":46.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Deluxe Box Plus","offer_id":51598075953471,"sku":"ET-27999266537","price":64.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/il_fullxfull.7473229885_jd7a.jpg?v=1764150714"},{"product_id":"enchanted-alchemist-witch-box-deluxe-ritual-kit-with-tarot-cards","title":"Enchanted Alchemist Witch Box  Deluxe Ritual Kit with Tarot Cards","description":"Step into the Alchemist’s Workshop.\u003cbr\u003e\nEvery item inside this deluxe witch box has been hand-selected to awaken your inner alchemist. Brew intention, blend herbs, light the transmutation flame, and perform your own sacred experiments in manifestation and transformation.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🔮 Includes:\u003cbr\u003e\n– 1 Large Raw Crystal or Tower\u003cbr\u003e\n– 3 Potion Bottles of Herbs (hand-labeled and sealed in wax)\u003cbr\u003e\n– 1 Mini Ritual Kit (Alchemy of Intent)\u003cbr\u003e\n– 1 Engraved Sigil Coin\u003cbr\u003e\n– 1 Spell Candle (Transmutation Flame)\u003cbr\u003e\n– 3 Intuitively Chosen Tarot Cards\u003cbr\u003e\n– 1 QR Code to The Alchemist’s Grimoire (exclusive digital ritual guide)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nPerfect for witchy souls, collectors, and seekers of beautiful chaos. Each box is unique — no two are the same.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🖤 Packaged in black tissue, sealed with wax, and infused with intention.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n✨ For ritual, aesthetic, or display purposes only.","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51598076936511,"sku":"ET-4403263467","price":65.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/il_fullxfull.7425338508_m5ja.jpg?v=1764150823"},{"product_id":"gothic-craft-box-dark-academia-witchy-art-supplies-diy-kit","title":"Gothic Craft Box  Dark Academia, Witchy Art Supplies DIY Kit","description":"Unleash your dark creative side. The Gothic Muse Box is a curated collection of moody, romantic, witchy, and vintage-inspired craft supplies — perfect for scrapbooking, journaling, mixed media, jewelry making, or simply feeding your inner chaos-artist.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nEvery box is a little different, because every muse has her own madness.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n💌 WHAT’S INSIDE\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nEach Gothic Muse Box includes 8–10 hand-picked items, such as:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tPremium patterned papers (black damask, vintage script, deep roses)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tWashi tape (lace, raven, or moon motifs)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tEmbellishment grab bag (metal keys, gems, sequins, or charms)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tWood or canvas base to decorate (coffin, frame, or heart)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tDIY element (air-dry clay rose mold, pigment, or mini paint)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tCraft tool or brush (detail brush, sponge, or tweezers)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tGothic stickers or die-cuts (tarot, crows, skulls, antique mirrors)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHandmade surprise (charm, pendant, or mini jewelry piece)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tQR code link to a secret printable or tutorial\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tBonus chance: 1 in 10 boxes hides a “Golden Ticket” for an extra charm or coupon!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🕯️ THE AESTHETIC\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nVelvet shadows, candlelight, and gold-trimmed drama.\u003cbr\u003e\nExpect a palette of black, crimson, gold, ivory, and smoke grey — textures like lace, satin, wax seals, and worn pages.\u003cbr\u003e\nOptional extras may include incense cones, velvet ribbons, or mini wax-seal stickers.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🎁 PACKAGING\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nYour Gothic Muse Box arrives wrapped in matte black tissue, sealed with a red rose wax sticker, and includes a card that reads:\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n“Every Muse has a little madness. Create recklessly.”\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🖤 PERFECT FOR\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tMixed-media artists \u0026amp; journal junkies\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tLovers of dark academia, witchy, or Victorian aesthetics\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHandmade gift givers\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAnyone who finds beauty in the shadows\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n✨ DETAILS\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tShips free within the U.S.\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tBox value: $40–$45\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tEach box is unique — no two are identical\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHandmade and curated by Her Royal Madness","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51598077231423,"sku":"ET-4399909628","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/il_fullxfull.7412794289_4v4g.jpg?v=1764150850"},{"product_id":"luxury-paper-ephemera-mystery-bag-red-roses-gold-foil","title":"Luxury Paper Ephemera Mystery Bag | Red Roses, Gold Foil","description":"❤️ The Scrap Queen’s Secret Stash — Queen of Hearts Edition 👑\u003cbr\u003e\nEnter the royal realm of creative chaos. Each mystery bag junk journal is an elegant explosion of red roses, gold foil, black-and-white patterns, and a whisper of glittering rebellion. This collection is made for crafters who love their paper with a little attitude — dramatic, regal, and unapologetically extra.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nPerfect for journaling, scrapbooking, card making, mixed media collage, resin art, or wrapping something so pretty it hurts to give away.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n⸻\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🌹 What’s Inside (varies by tier):\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n💌 Designer Papers \u0026amp; Textures\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHand-cut designer papers in red, white, black, and gold foil\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tPatterns include: roses, playing cards, stripes, hearts, and vintage scrollwork\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tAccents of gold glitter, embossed details, and luxe cardstock\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🎀 Embellishments \u0026amp; Trims\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tLace, silk ribbon, metallic cords, or gold leaf flakes\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tSmall heart charms, wax seal bits, or foil accents\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n🖋️ The Royal Ephemera Pack (Queen of Hearts Style)\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tMini love letters and scandalous royal decrees\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tFaux postage stamps with crowns and hearts\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tVintage portraits with gold borders\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tDie-cut hearts, crowns, and key silhouettes\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tRose petal confetti and gold glitter dust\u003cbr\u003e\n\t•\tHidden “Royal Slip” inside, such as:\u003cbr\u003e\n“Queen’s decree #13: Drama counts as art.”\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n💎 Handmade Accent Piece\u003cbr\u003e\nOne handcrafted clay, acrylic, or resin piece — think tiny red rose, gold crown charm, or heart wax seal.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n👑 Tiers \u0026amp; Pricing\u003cbr\u003e\nTier\u003cbr\u003e\nName\u003cbr\u003e\nPrice\u003cbr\u003e\nContents\u003cbr\u003e\n1\u003cbr\u003e\nThe Pauper’s Pocket\u003cbr\u003e\n$15\u003cbr\u003e\nStarter mix: red \u0026amp; gold papers, small ephemera set\u003cbr\u003e\n2\u003cbr\u003e\nScrap Queen’s Secret Stash\u003cbr\u003e\n$25\u003cbr\u003e\nFull royal mix, red roses \u0026amp; glitter gold accents\u003cbr\u003e\n3\u003cbr\u003e\nThe Royal Hoard\u003cbr\u003e\n$45\u003cbr\u003e\nDeluxe bundle: double volume, resin charm, wax seal, premium packaging\u003cbr\u003e\n🎁 Packaging \u0026amp; Presentation\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWrapped in black-and-gold tissue, tied with red ribbon and a wax-sealed tag.\u003cbr\u003e\nEach box includes a printed scroll:\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n“You have been deemed worthy of royal chaos. Handle with flair.”","brand":"Her Royal Madness","offers":[{"title":"The Pauper’s Pocket","offer_id":51598077460799,"sku":"ET-27912742950","price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Scrap Queen’s Stash","offer_id":51598077493567,"sku":"ET-27912742954","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"The Royal Hoard","offer_id":51598077526335,"sku":"ET-27912742960","price":45.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/files\/il_fullxfull.7375878423_l84h.jpg?v=1764150873"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0862\/8138\/8351\/collections\/CC75926E-AEAC-4993-9E4E-F0E340F5A469.png?v=1769998604","url":"https:\/\/herroyalmadnessco.com\/collections\/the-vault.oembed","provider":"Her Royal Madness","version":"1.0","type":"link"}